Wild, part 2

I would be remiss if I didn’t continue my post from almost a week ago. There are other things to write about this week, but I must finish this idea. 

In thinking about the remarks and feedback I got, the underlying statement which I am choosing to read is:

“Please, when you are newly married, or when you decide to get married, don’t get rid of anything that is quintessentially you. Don’t stop traveling, playing, performing, reading, discovering …” 

Of course not. Let’s think about how Zheng and I met …

While traveling, in order to play and perform with one of the top violists in the United States, and while I was over there, I was writing (the single most-populated category on this blog is still China), and discovering an entirely different world.

So you see, my husband and I met while I was simply “doing my thing.” 

(If I could have a dollar for every time I really worried about my romantic life before hitting 30, I could retire tomorrow).

Zheng and I met when I was on the wildest trip of my life. I don’t see things morphing into the barefoot-kitchen-vacuuming-hairbow stage ever, and definitely not soon.

I will now share the sweet story that prompted this subject in the first place. Zheng and I were off most of last Sunday together. We played church together, and then I was free until 7:30 PM. 

After taking a nap, and then starting to prepare dinner, Zheng asked me what I was going to do next.

“READ!” I said with such reverence … 

So I took some tea into our bedroom. The cats followed me in. I started reading on my Kindle, interestingly, “Wild” by Cheryl Strayed. (I highly recommend this book. It’s really beautiful). 

Enter Zheng, with his iPad mini, proceeding to set it up to watch something … meaning make noise, meaning destroy the beautiful reading silence and disturb the sleeping kitties snuggled at my feet.

Absolutely not.

I told him that if was going to snuggle next to me and watch, he had to put earphones on. He protested. 

I assured him that I was serious, and that he could go watch TV out in the den, or else use the headphones. He acquiesced. 

See … I haven’t lost any spark or fire. I’m lucky to have a spouse who understands this. 





 

Wild, Part 1

I can’t help but chuckle to myself when thinking about a remark I heard in the fall … 

A friend of a good friend (but not someone I know well) has kept in touch with me via “email-log.” 

Before I started this blog, I would send an “email letter” or “entry” to a mailing list, which was on bcc (blind carbon copy) basis. This would sometimes lead to “daemon-mailer” messages, in response, from messages that got lost in the electronic frontier. These are an annoyance of grand proportion when you are traveling by train through Europe. It was also cumbersome to send pictures at times, if I hadn’t been uploading diligently. 

The blog is the replacement of that. It means that anyone can read the posts who has the link, or who knows what to look for.

This person was on my email-list when it existed. We’ve corresponded about the overlap between spirituality and the arts, specifically music. We don’t write to each other often, but I savor the letters when I get them. They are always beautifully written. He has gotten to know me, remotely, over a number of years, and as probably (as he thinks of it) as somewhat of a “wild woman.” There are bits of truth to that. 

I would say that anyone in the arts these days must have a little “wild” in them. Why else would we want to listen to them? 

Let’s define wild, especially as it applies to the arts.

1. (of an animal or plant) living or growing in the natural environment; not domesticated or cultivated.

2. uncontrolled or unrestrained, especially in pursuit of pleasure.

3. very enthusiastic or excited.

4. a wild card, or something that is unknown that, when introduced, changes the game.

If artists-creators-writers-musicians-actors-directors cannot tap into some or all of the above qualities, they aren’t worth spending any time on.

The remark that was relayed to me was,

“I don’t believe she got married.”

And my response was - 

“Really?” 

Does marriage diminish wildness? Is it such an institution that people can’t retain some original core of who they are? Or is the very decision to get married seen as a surrender to once-wild images? When Zheng and I announced our engagement, numerous remarks reached me such as, “I hope she doesn’t stop traveling!” or “I hope she doesn’t loose her ambition!” 

My response to both of these is - 

“Really?” 

(To be continued ...)

PHOTO: From our wedding rehearsal! Zheng's mother had come from China to visit us and to attend our wedding. She designed and made the clothes that we are wearing.